To Correct or Not To Correct

I do not use AI to support my writing in English and Turkish.  At least, that is how it is at the moment.

It is of course not because I oppose to the use of AI.  It becomes a lifesaver in many areas of our lives when needed.

It is because sometimes I use certain expressions in a way that could appear as an incorrect way to be used in a sentense or an incorrect way to say in that language.  Yet, sometimes I feel it has to be said that way.  Or sometimes it is about punctuations that are used in ways out of the ordinary.  Especially when writing poetry.

It is true that now books are written almost instantaneously with AI.  It is said that soon all writing will be done by AI.  Could be true, but it is also true that the desire to share what seems to bubble out or sometimes burst out of mind and soul will also continue to as long as humans live.  

May we all find the most appropriate means to share what we believe is important and meaningful.

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It is true that we are blessed if there are people who protect us in the rooms that we are not in.  Who believe in us, who know, love and trust us. 

And I feel most proud of myself when I am able to do it.  And sometimes for people who are no longer among us in this world.

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... The weight of a dream that is too big... 

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"Life is all about perspective."

To Hope, To Wish, To Endure

I also, like so many more, want to believe that the goodness will prevail in this world of ours.

Yet, though it is hard to see, good people seem to suffer more, the wicked seem to win, the unloving, the uncaring, the ruthless, the merciless seem to get even more brutal and bold, and the gentle majority seem to live with the pain of being treated unjustly.

It is kind of sad how the loving and peaceful world that we hoped for still seems to be the wish of the younger ones who are facing a seemingly even more cruel world.

Let me get the record straight, I am not a pessimist at all. On the contrary, I believe that behind the seeming chaos of life, there is an order that supports good intentions.  This belief of mine is not only about the trust in the divine without a bias for a certain religion, but more of a belief in the unproved and for me the tested by time rules of the universe which at its own timing favors the good and just. With hindsight, this all is very true to me; the hard to endure part is the 'divine', the 'earthly and cosmic' timing.

The instinctive reaction to being faced with injustices is to retaliate. For many of us.  It takes a lot of courage, compassion and patience to endure the desire to reciprocate the cruelty.  If one gives in to that desire, the innately kind and loving suffer even more.  Therefore, for the true believers in goodness, there is no other way that being true to their heart and soul which want and desperately try to believe in kindness. 

No one truly knows what the after life is like if there is one; yet, for those who are able to do no harm and succeed in staying honest and loving, the gift is a peaceful heart and soul from having won an indescribable inner war.

May life protect all of those who are pure in heart.

Instagram: Zeynep Kocasinan Art Account @zeynepkocasinan_art

You can find Zeynep Kocasinan's paintings on Instagram in her art account:

@zeynepkocasinan_art   (Zeynep Kocasinan Art / ZK Art Studio)

Watercolors, Oil Paintings, Acrylics

Breathe

 As we tend to forget, before our next steps, let's remember to breathe...

A Song

And, yes, like so many have done before, it is possible to fall in love with a song...

Love

Once in a while we will see an old couple walk hand in hand will a calm and sweet demeanor that feels as if time has stopped or was they are forever flowing or they shine with a different brightness regardless of their age, something different that we become aware of them, even when they are just walking slowly in front of us. 

At those magical times, we are probably witnessing something extra special.  

A time of witnessing two parts of a soul meeting as a couple in this lifetime.  

Though some of us may have experienced that in the pages of our past, some of us still are to discover that special feeling of belonging and love.

May life give us many joyful chances to discover happiness and love. 

Where Do You Think You Most Belong?

 This morning I came across an interesting quesiton in an online class that I was following.

The question was:   Where do you think you most belong?

As I was trying to grasp the meaning of the question, I realized that the answer to this question has changed over the years. Maybe as it should.  

However,  the difference or range of all of the places, groups and ideas that I thought I belonged to really changed over the years. As I grew and as I changed. In a way.   

At times I was surprised to find myself in a group of engineers, at times with a meditation group in England or a group in Japan. And many more. They all seemed to point out the path that I have walked along the way and although they were different, I came to acknowledge that all of them define a part of me, all of them were about the things that I wanted to 'touch'.

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The journey of discovering ourselves continues every day. With ups and downs.  With new awakenings, with unconscious knowledge becoming conscious, with simplified desires, as well as more defined preferences. With more detailed expectations and with letting go of expectations. With gratitude, as well as regrets.  All seems to make up what we call the ever changing living.

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My journey with this question of belonging will probably continue as well.

We

It all adds up to 1,

Our joys and sorrows,

You smile as you cry,

I give thanks as I secretly rebel to what is.

The Life in the Cloud

The fat, white cloud appearing behind the old olive trees,

You know me,

We have met before,

In the waves of the Mediterranean sea

we have embraced many a times,

with joy and fear,

In the air that I breathe,

In the dampness that I wipe off,

the jasmine that I love to smell,

the salamender hiding in the corners,

the coffee, the cake, the icecube in the rosé wine,

…

The water flowing in my body

feels the freedom of the sky.

Looking For A New Chapter

It surely does become more difficult to write with years. 

Because I become more and more aware of the ripple effects of each and every word.  

Good intentions are important, yet more insufficient than I would have hoped for.  

Still, as I am always very grateful for all the words, feelings and thoughts that have reached me, moved me, changed me, that made me question, challenge, trust, hope and surrender, I would like to share their resonance in me and how life seems from that perspective that currently lives as me. 

Maybe, just maybe, as it is for me, someone might also need to, or would like to, hear that which I may channel through.  

And maybe, that is the reason there is hopefully still some room for some new words to be told on this world of ours.

May what I have shared over the years, and from now on, be gentle on my and your soul.

Breadcrumbs

Have you also had the experience of not recognizing your own words when you read your dairies or your old blog posts?

This realization years ago was one of the reasons that I knew that I had to write.  Not only really wanting to write, but feeling the strong pressure from realizing that if I do not write, I will not remember the me at that time or the moments that really meant something.

Some people are very good with remembering the past with many intricate details.  For me, only some of those moments remain  intact and clear with all of the events, thoughts and emotions that come with them.  Others, sort of blend with who I am.  

I believe that all of our experiences and encounters actually stay with us.  Those moments are not really lost, but still I value being able to return to those moments.

Family and friends make life also precious by creating bridges to our past.   Maybe for that reason, I feel like each loss and each connection severed diminishes who I am. For who I am seems to be also defined by what I am able to remember.

And then I write. Write some more.  Then I stop and start again.

  

When I stop, it is not totally because I am scared of the effort and the vulnerability that comes with exposing who I am, because we do go through those waves of emotions and thoughts like everyone else.  I learned how difficult it really is to decide to share what we write when I started to write my newspaper columns and when I published my previous eight books.  However,  writing is making a choice.  It is taking a stand, however naive or ‘innocent’ the topic and content may be.  And it is about making sure that we are sincere and are truthful to who we are.

Sometimes my friends and family members ask me how I know that what I write is meaningful for others, if it is worth the effort?  I personally cannot say that writing brought me a lot of financial returns. It is more about believing in the positive ripple effects of our intended positive contribution. It is about that unstoppable feeling that takes us to the computer or makes us rush to find that notebook and pen.  

And also, time again I receive an email, a phone message from a friend or a reader that I did not know existed who encourages me to continue to write and share that it made a difference in their lives.  Each time I receive such a message, I am humbled, but also grateful.  Because then, even though they do not share the details, I know what might have touched their heart.  They become a compass that shows me the way.  

Whether we acknowledge it or not, we actually do know when we write well, however, we also do know that to be able to write that unique and worthwhile piece, we need to keep on writing, keep on trying to decide what our unique contribution is and to let that message take form. 

And to continue to leave those breadcrumbs leading us back to our soul.

Every morning we wake up to a new day to decide how to act, react and respond to what life sends our way. 

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Yes, sometimes those who do not deserve it will succeed.

Sometimes it will be the bad who win.

As it was told, efforts will lie, but, regardless of the results,  I still do believe, they will not be in vain.

For the universe, seen or unseen, always responds to the honest efforts of a pure and true heart in its own language.

Sometimes

Give me dark,

Give me darker,

Today,

Black is not dark enough.

The Then Future

I always assumed I liked the sun more than the snow.

Then again,  I was always more pulled in by the surprise than the acknowledged.

Under the shadow of approvals, I was the the timid rebellious.

If only you knew me.

If only you did.

Past could have been different. 

And so the now, which was then the future.

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Sometimes hues of greys and browns with a dash of blue and light are what we have and what we need.

Lifetimes

There are days of color and days of darkness,

Days of joy or dismay,

Days to cherish, days to run away from,

With meanings within,

And without,

We have lived the stories one after the other,

Expected or unexpected, chosen and not asked for,

More chosen then not,

Perfect is this sunny sleepness morning that I am waking up to,

And was perfect, so they say, the day with the gloom and the pain,

You and me, met again and maybe for the first time,

Under the olive tree, near the cactus, 

Enjoying the redness of the Japanese roses, 

with a hint of its yellow dust in our hands.